Friday, March 2, 2012

First

So I've tried at blogs before.

I've tried to write for other people, figuring out what they wanted. And then after abandoning blog after blog, I realized that wasn't working.

So this is an experiment of sorts. To try and write solely for me and invite whomever stumbles across this blog, along for the ride.

So about me. I am a twenty-something grad student with a history of terrible eating habits. Then, last summer, it all changed. I stopped my pattern of disordered -and to be quite blunt about it binge- eating. I was never diagnosed, because I never sought help, but when you meet basically all the criteria, you know something's not right.

I wish I could tell you precisely what changed in my life so you could replicate it and be successful, but I can't. Mostly because I can't pinpoint it entirely myself, but also in part because this journey is so personal that what motivates me may be meaningless to you.

Over the summer, I spent some time with a friend who was a really great role model. I don't think they even realize what an impact they had on me, but in just doing what they do, it really inspired me to rethink the way I thought about food and health. Maybe sometime, when I get enough courage, I'll thank them. I'm really kind of private with my goals and successes (and failures), but I'll get into that later.

I've flirted with vegetarianism for about the last 6 years, but out of convenience to others,  I never stuck with it. (If you notice, the theme of me trying to do things for other people- it's a recurring one). But I've been vegetarian since last summer now. I'll be entirely honest, my motivations are primarily taste. I just don't like meat. I was the kind of person that would dissect meat if there were veins or discolored bits. And as much as I love to cook, the closest I would get to a piece of raw meat was a pair of tongs. The other part  is health related. I find that when I stay away from meat, I generally eat healthier things. It almost forces me to be more conscious of my food choices, and when I do that I generally make better decisions.

I've lost 64.9 pounds since last July. That is more weight than every single previous attempt. Combined. I still have a long way to go. But I no longer weigh 316 pounds. And although there's still a bit of anxiety when I say that, it's outweighed (ha!) by the pride.

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